garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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