so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
