Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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