yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Randomize
