Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
