i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
