I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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