But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize
