you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
