Nicole vs. Life
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
