Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
"it" just moved
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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