i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
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