thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
