I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
