You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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