no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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