I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
