OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
