How'd it feel making her break her religion?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
