I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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