I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so Iβd say itβs safe to say it was a good weekend
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
Randomize