could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize
