: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
