my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
