Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
