Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
