you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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