No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Randomize
