I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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