Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Randomize