Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Enjoy the penises
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
