He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I'm just crazy horny about you
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I need water and some morals
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
