Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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