That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
