May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
