No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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