Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
