Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
