How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
