My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
