We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
