I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
