Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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