Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize