Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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