He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
