your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
