Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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