I must be too annoying 4 u.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize
