we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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