we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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