I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
